to-do list song

oh that list on the wall
of things Ill never do
like take out the trash
and get over you

oh that spider on the floor
second one Ive squished today
how very poetic of me
to mention arachnids anyway

CHORUS
well its not that artsy
what a mess I am
how I cant sleep at night
Its kind of sad
how I would like a spider
to sit near my lighter
if I smoked at all
at least things would be brighter
if I had you
to sit down beside me, here.

oh because staring at the wall
wont cut it anymore
if I see another re-run
I might end up dead on the floor

(to chorus)

oh that list on the wall
oh that spider on the floor
how does any one find love anymore?

belong (possible title)

mm to figure you out
how good we'd be together
we wouldnt have to wonder
mm to figure you out
I know we'd make it
we wouldn't have to wander

you pretend to look through me
do you even know
I cant get you off my mind
youre on it all the time
like a clock with broken parts
Im failing without you
and breaking apart

Famous Dreams

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKfDwChOoHI

I thought I had a dream
where life was how I wanted it to be
I woke up to see
that this dream wasn' t a reality

I thought I had a dream
where I could fly with the stars
(instead) I woke to screaming cars
and nothing but scars

If only I could dream of happiness
then maybe I would be satisfied
with the mediocridy of nullified
Or perhaps dream of loneliness
and be content with happiness

--------------------------
FOOTNOTE:
Im not sure about the whole last stanza. I feel like it explains the previous two stanzas, but may be too dfficult to understand. I guess I'll leave it for now and make changes later.

This poem was inspired my numerous things- one being Martin Luther King's opening line, "I had a dream....". The other inspiration is a song by Priscilla Ahn, "Dream." Both are wonderful. Last is my previous post about my dreams.

Comment if you feel, please!

woken up

I want to be remembered

as someone who really did something

not for themesevles

but for making a change



In this world

where there is too much despair

In this life

where there are too many souls wasted

from ignorance or purely inhumanity



------------------------------------------





DIARY PORTION:

I dont really know what that ^^ is-a poem most likely. Its more just my current thoughts. For example, when I was younger I wanted to be a professional dancer. I worked my very hardest to pay for dance lessons ( at age 14). I detassled in the morning ( a type of extremely vigirous migrant field work) until 3 or so, then I would go to dance at night. I was extremely exhausted and not to mention sore. I still loved to dance, but I couldnt afford it and my parents wouldve even drive me down to the dance studio. So I gave up my dream of dancing. When I see professional dancers in any performance, a part inside of me cries. I want so badly to not have failed at my dream. I still love dance and have always tried to take lessons. Now that Im out of high school its hard to find a studio or class suitable for the 'retired love' dancer.


Sorry Ill try to write better on the next post, maybe some songs.

Comment if you like!

Song: wrong direction

(chorus)
Ive been wrong
looking in the wrong places
running in different directions
Ive been wrong
looking to the wrong faces
running in different directions
Ive been wrong

vs.1
its hard to see/inside my mind
God knows my heart/and theres nothing I can hide
I cant cover up the lies that-

I can do this on my own
I dont need His help home

((chorus))
vs.2
He loves me strong/even when I dont decide
to follow like I should/I still try to hide
I cant cover up the lies that

I can do this on my own
I dont need His help home
((chorus))


tag:
But
I've been wrong
I cant do this on my own
I've been wrong
I need help
to find my way home

------------------------------------------------------------------
still working on that title ^^


DIARY PORTION:
So many times I try to run in two different directions when it comes to God and how I should live my life. Thats why so often I end up standing still, right where I dont want to be. I surround myself with distractions that only pull me down yet still I expect to be able to keep these things away? Is that not a little...well stupid?But thats what we do. We mess up, and God picks us up. Thats what is so ecstatically amazing about Him. No other person would help someone like me. Like me: a hypocrite, a sinner, a liar.

God is unmeritably great.

Notable Leaders

First, the president:
Personally, I would have voted against Obama even before he was elected. I do not support a lot of the things he stands for. However, it is very important to "support" whoever is in power. By support I dont necessarily mean agree with everything, just dont be ignorant. If the people are not behind the power then we-as a country- are worthless. We have to stick around and fight through storms. Given, I would be more apt to say this if someone I did approve of was in Office. Still the philosophy stands.

Second veterans:
I find it outrageuosly rude and angering how some Americans treat those who FIGHT FOR YOUR FREEDOM. Even though everyone might not support the war in Iraq and such, those soliders are still fighting for us and our country. Everyone should be thanking every solider they see for giving them the choices we have today. I cannot even express how frustrated I become when I hear someone speaking illy of servants of freedom. As if they could do a better job!

This all sparked from an event today. I cashier and an older man came through my line with his wife, I noticed he wore an "Army Retired" shirt. I asked what war he served in and he answered, "Which One? Vietnam?World War 2?..." and another one I cant remember. Thats pretty awesome I think. I thanked him for serving. He really appreciated it and I was happy to brighten his day. You know thats a huge problem, we are often hardly grateful for the freedoms we have! I have made it somewhat of a point to thank every man in uniform I see, but now I am not going to miss an opportunity, ever. So many soliders suffer severe mental effects from the wars they serve in. The LEAST we can do is simply say, thank you.

-------------------------
(side note)
I wonder what this man thought of me. Maybe he wondered, why is this teenager thanking me for serving? what are her moral values? I guess they dont just eat junk food. Maybe he was having a hard day and that made it better, I hope so.

Thats all.

John 1: New Life

DIARY PORTION:

So I am a follow of Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior. I recently shared the gospel with a friend of mine, lets call her Chelsea. Chelsea has an amazing life stoy. She was diagnosed with Tourettes syndrome, ADD, and OCD at a young age. Her parents told-and continue to tell her- that there's something wrong with the way she is. She's messed up, but I think the contrary.

Despite all set backs Chelsea is a vibrant flower among many sleeping bodies. She is always friendly and perky;her enthusiasm amazes me. Even before she was "saved" she had more joy and I ever did as a true Believer. (These sleeping bodies I refferred to are christians who just mope around, but if we truly know Jesus than we should be ecstatic with joy!)

Anyways her parents are devout Catholics and forcibly pick her up for Mass services. Chelsea does not want to go because she wants to learn the truth about Jesus. Let me take a moment to examine the catholic faith.

True catholics believe:
1) you must take part in the sacraments
-where in the bible does it say you have to DO any thing to be saved? Does it not say, " For by grace we have been saved, and that NOT OF OURSELVES, it is a gift of God, NOT OF WORKS, so that no man may boast?" (Ephesians 2:8-9)

2) Mary is the mediator
-again where does it say that you must go through Mary to get to Christ/Heaven? On the contrary, Jesus says, " I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father but by me." (John 14:6) it doesnt say, no one comes to the Father but by Mary and I.

--If that isnt enought to prove folly in the Catholic system, I could find more.

BACK TO CHELSEA:
She has just become saved but her parents wont allow her to come to church. She lives with her foster mom who is "christian" but doesnt attend church. Thankfully she allows Chelsea to come to some bible studies with me. Chelsea desperately wants to learn more about Jesus but is hindered greatly by her parents. Then I thought, If she cant come to church then I'll bring church to her. So I am going to meet with her and talk about Jesus! We are going to start with the gospel of John.

TODAY:
I thought it would be a good idea to read John 1 in depth, so I can better help Chelsea. You know what I love about the bible? It never fades and gets old. I found so much comfort in reading John 1! God reveals new things to us every time we read the bible. I could read the same passage 12,000 times and still get something new out of it, i.e. something I missed or had forgotten.


THAT IS ALL.
If you read all of this, please please please comment. Because you just wasted your time (and mine)if you read all of this and really have nothing to say. Well maybe I enlightened you...

thank you!